.LonelinessI screwed up again. It's the story of my life. I expect the worst and Iget the worst. Just when I think I might be doing well I end up fallinginto the same void and seeing the worst in everyone.Let me back up. I was always a loner, even from birth. I was theunwanted 3rd of four children. I was always sick, always getting hurt,always too weak or frail to do much of what everyone else was doing. Iwas always the one who caused others fail because I was never as goodas I should have been and in time it caused everyone to get angry orupset at me.It hurt. Every effort to make friends invariably ended once people sawme trying to get to know someone. The rumors about me were the worst,then came the sly remarks about how it would look to others to be seenaround me. As if by magic the warmth and friendship evaporated. I wasignored, told to just, "Go away", or beaten.After this happened for the 20t time, or more accurately when I reached2nd grade, I gave up. I stayed away from. Clive had just got a call from his ex to say that Amber had the flu and wouldn’t be coming this week which was a shame as the plan was for two of her best friends Lyn and Beth were due to come after school for a weekend sleepover and to use his PC for some school project which Clive had agreed to. Lyn and Beth were twins and Clive had only met them once before and found them to be nice girls although he had found his eyes wandering when they last visited, they were identical and Clive had a problem telling them apart, something that he made a joke about.Friday afternoon arrived and Clive sat thinking about how his weekend could have been had Amber not gone sick when the doorbell rang and peering out the window he saw it was Lyn and Beth standing at the door, did they not know that the sleepover had been cancelled, Clive wasn’t prepared and had just got out of the shower and only had a bath robe on but he went to the door, “Hello Girls” he said, “Did you not know that Amber is sick.
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